Greaseball

Yesterday after A and I made our 8:00 AM rounds (aka walked Waterside) we both noticed I had black specks on my face.

Weird.

Upon further CSI-style investigation, I discovered that the black specks were gnats.

Gnats. On my face.

What's worse? They were sodden....and dead.

As I walked through the annoying clouds of gnats by the lake, they drowned on my greaseball, sweaty face. That's right, the poor little innocent gnats DROWNED in the puddles of sweat collecting on my face. Call me Gnatzilla.

uuuugggghhhhh!

Just one of those days.

Five Years Already

Exactly five years ago D and I were in beautiful Kauai eloping. We found this "minister" online (ha!) and had booked her for June 1 at 2:00pm to perform our ceremony. D and I decided to eat a nice brunch and get to the spot we were meeting the minister early. Unfortunately (and yet I can't seem to regret it) I discovered delicious Lappert's Coconut Ice Cream the day before. I decided that since it was MY wedding day, I MUST get an ice cream cone before the ceremony....and maybe after, too! If any of you have ever been to Hawaii, you know that the pace is much slower there than here in Texas! We took way too long getting my ice cream and barely had time to get ready for our wedding...which is why my hair is all funky (I prioritize makeup over hair ALWAYS). So we ran (literally late for our own wedding) to meet our minister.

We booked a cute little package deal that came with ceremonial leis, photographs, and a cake. I had spoken to our minister on the phone several times and was a little nervous because she seemed very detached (detached= nice word for airhead). When we finally met she was very nice. She brought the photographer (her daughter- in dreads with hairy legs and armpits!) and showed us the way to a private little cove where we would say our vows. We began thinking we might have been a little hasty with the internet minister when she started pointing out little areas where she "could leave us to make love" if we wanted... we didn't! Ew!!!

After the vows

The ceremony was short and sweet and exactly what we wanted. We were barefoot on a gorgeous beach in Hawaii, what more could we ask for? How about a marriage certificate that spells our names correctly? (BTW- Hawaii is ridonkulously bureaucratic and it was very difficult to get things corrected!!!)

After the ceremony, we learned about the photographer and her friends, the "bliss-ninnies" .... these are big groups of hippies (with armpit and leg hair, presumably) that sit around smoking weed and touching each other. In short, ninnies for bliss!. The Bliss-Ninny also kept trying to get us to make out for the camera! (We all know she was hoping we'd go find a private cove!!!---GROSS!)

Bliss-Ninny on left

If nothing else, we will definitely remember our wedding in Hawaii!

I love you, D!!!!!!

Best. Book. Ever.

I read ahead of the Enrichment Book Club schedule. Way ahead. And I found a new favorite book!!! I posted about it before, but hadn't gotten around to reading it then. I JUST NOW finished it and am totally depressed it's over! The Guernsey Literary and Potato Peel Pie Society is the cutest, saddest, quirkiest, funnest ("funnest" = real word in my world) book, EVER! I can't believe how much I enjoyed reading it- I was a little thrown off by the writing style (all personal letters between the characters), but am now amazed at the creativity of the author(s) for pulling it off! I just want to encourage everyone who has heard of this book or even just walked by it at some point to pick it up and read it! CV, tell your mom THANK YOU for recommending it- I'm so happy she did! My copy is available to anyone who wants to borrow it, but beware:

"If you borrow me, I pray,
Treat me as a friend;
Keep me by your fireside,
And to no others lend.

Guard my leaves and keep them clean,
Do not turn them down;
With no pencil marks deface,
Nor with thumb-marks brown."

or...

"Look ye, my friend
If this booke I lend,
Be sure to return
Or in H will ye burn!"

or...

"Solemnly do you swear
This same book, not to tear,
Nor dirty, nor fray?
For your soul will I pray,
If the return you delay"

or even better...

"Steal not this book, my worthy friend,
For fear the gallows will be your end;
Up the ladder and down the rope,
There you'll hang until you choke!
Then I'll come along and say--
"Where's that book you stole away?"



Ha ha, so I got slightly distracted looking for clever book-borrower warnings. I invite everyone to find one and post it in the comments---or better yet, make up your own and post that! Now what was this post originally about?????

Quote of the Day- Courtesy Liz Pabst

"I'm not easily offended. You'd have to literally yank a donut out of my hand to offend me!"
-Liz Pabst, 2009 Richmond Ward Memorial Day Breakfast


I heart you, Liz!